Monday, January 27, 2014

Mondays with Martha

In the last month or so, I've had several conversations with single men and women around the same question. "How come I'm not meeting anyone?"
Some of them continue to do what's not working but somehow believe it will work. Others, especially singles over 45, really want to meet others but no one would have a clue.

My latest Topic to be discussed at the next "Social  Circles" is about Flirting and other ways to connect. Many women today are aggressive and not giving the man a chance to make or not make his move. I've had women argue with me that at dance parties etc. they ask the men to dance. The man may or may not dance with them but usually nothing comes of it. Or if it does the man gets used to you taking the lead and you become the man in the relationship. If a man is interested and you're approachable he will ask you.

Then, there are the men especially the older ones who will ask women to dance but ask the wrong women. If you're going for much younger women, you may get turned down. OK, take a chance. But do you just want just a dance or more? 

There are the single women who are definitely interested in dating but carry themselves in a way that comes off as unapproachable. Their affect and contained personality say to men "stay away". When they really want to say "come my way". No one likes rejection, including men, so carry yourself in a relaxed friendly manner.

We continually want to do things our way even if it doesn't work. It's like wanting to lose weight but still wanting to eat whatever you want to eat.

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