Mondays with Martha

I Love You: 15 Ways Guys Say It Without Saying It (Part 1)

By Samantha Escobar  http://www.yourtango.com/

The silent ways he's showing you he cares.

Has your guy been fairly silent in the 4-letter-word department, and you're trying to figure out other ways to tell if he loves you? Sometimes, this can be hard; not everybody is vocal or obvious about their feelings, and many may feel it is difficult to voice those deeper emotions whether it's for fear of rejection, commitment or simply never having said "I Love You" before.                                                                                          
Here are the first 8 some subtle, silent ways to tell if he's thinking it.

1. Passionate, Long-Lasting Kisses
Who doesn't love an excellent, lengthy kiss? When he's continuously initiating these and you can feel the passion each time he does, it is clear that he's more than just a little excited to be around you.
2. His Friends Love You
If all his buddies are starting to warm up to you and truly seem to enjoy your company, it could be because they know how happy you're making their friend — thus making them start to find you as awesome as he does.
3. Close Personal Distance
You know how it's unnerving when somebody you're not interested in gets close to you? It's the complete opposite when someone you adore tends to be closer in distance than he is to other people.
4. Smiling After Kissing
Sure, you can have a little sweet smile after kissing someone whose company you enjoy, but do you ever just feel like positively beaming when it's someone you love? If you catch him grinning after your kisses all the time, it's a great sign that he truly enjoys your company.
5. He Listens Intently
While he might not be saying much when it comes to your relationship and his feelings about it, the fact that he listens closely when you're talking is incredibly significant. He may lean in closer when you're discussing important topics or nod when you say something poignant, showing how much your words mean to him.
6. Upright Posture
Most of us tend to slouch and have poorer posture than we should. However, if you're trying to impress the person you care about most and want him or her to be most attracted to you, you're going to stand or sit straight up.
7. Hand Squeezing
I once had a relationship with a guy who loved holding my hand and would occasionally squeeze it tightly when we were cuddling or out with friends, but hated any other kind of cutesy couple-like act. I always wondered why he was so opposed, but then I realized that every time he squeezed my hand, he was trying to say, "I love you" in a quiet, simple way.
8. Calling (Or Texting) For No Reason
Not all people do this when in love, so don't take it personally if he doesn't. That said, it's a sign that he feels comfortable with you in non-romantic situations as well as the obvious ones, and that he's thinking of you throughout the day. 

Mondays with Martha

4 Steps to Flirting Success

Resident dating blogger, Maura Kelly interviews pick-up artist and bestselling author of The Game Neil Strauss. Here are some ideas of out how to become an expert flirt. By Diana Vilibert

Flirting 101

Practice Small Talk
Before you approach a guy you're into, make sure you've got the basics of small talk down. "Challenge yourself to go out and make small talk with five strangers today," advises Strauss. "Don’t worry about whether they’re people you want to date. Approach grandfathers, other women, someone who’s not your type, whomever you come across. It’ll help you adjust to stepping out of your comfort zone."


Perfect Your Body Language
Want to get under his skin? "Get just a centimeter into a guy’s comfort zone, and look up at him with big eyes," says Strauss. The no-fail move? "Put your chest out, chin down, eyes high in the socket, head slightly tilted, and your weight on one foot. That’s important. If your feet are planted, they feel the resistance, just as much as they would if you had your arms crossed." Practice makes perfect--you might look like a cross-eyed chicken at first, but get it down right and it’ll make him crazy.

Ask for Help
When it comes to conversation starts, asking for his help or opinion is a sure thing, says Strauss. "Maybe it’s some article from a women’s magazine that offers some kind of advice and you want to know if he agrees with it or not. Or maybe it’s: "It’s my cousin’s birthday and I want to buy him a CD—but his taste hasn’t evolved since the 80's. Any suggestions?" Or maybe your friend just got a cat and you need a name for it."

Make It Fun—For You
"If it seems like you're trying too hard, whatever you're doing will come across as desperate," Strauss says. His advice? "Think: "I'm fun. I'm cool. I radiate charisma, I am free to do whatever the hell I want." The most important thing to remember while you’re doing all this flirting is to make it fun for yourself—because then it will be fun for the other person."

Social Circles

Don't Miss "Social Circles" a FREE Event Tuesday 2/18 6 to 7:30 pm. The sun will be shining in the afternoon with temperatures above 40.

Singles 30 + Come out to mingle, talk and get to know each other! Snacks and Beverages Provided. Topic "Flirting and other ways to find my Valentine" Call Martha #215-584-0188 E-mail martha@marthassingles.com www.marthassingles.com

Social Circles

Don't Miss This Tuesday 2/18 "Social Circles"  6pm @ the Southampton Free Library 
947 Street Rd. This is a FREE Event open to all Singles over 30.

Single Men and Women mingle, talk and get to know each other.  

Topic   "Flirting and other ways to find My Valentine"

Snacks and Beverages Provided.
 
RSVP Today! Call Martha # 215-584-0188 E-mail martha@marthassingles.com
All you have to do is show up!

Social Circles is a Free Event happening the third Tuesday night of every month 6 to 7:30 pm. 

Mondays with Martha

As Valentine's Day approaches, love is in the air in all shapes and forms at Downton Abbey.  When it comes to matters of the heart, last night's episode reminds us that whether it is 1922 or 2014, certain truths about love are timeless.

Matters of the Heart; Lessons from Downton Abbey 

By Elisabeth LaMotte  

Never Know You Love Him Till You Let Him Go:
Downstairs, Ivy's love story is as old as time.  For months she has overlooked Alfred's romantic gazes and gentlemanly gestures, while pining for the suave and stuck-up Jimmy.  Even when Jimmy took her out and encouraged her to get so drunk she could barely walk, she continued to choose him over Alfred. Suddenly, Alfred has a chance to move up in the world through training in London at The Ritz. It is not until Alfred says goodbye that Ivy realizes her mistake and all she has lost.


Forbidden Love Can Make the Heart Grow Stronger:
Cousin Rose is bursting with excitement about a surprise concert she is planning for Lord Grantham's birthday celebration. It turns out that her enthusiasm is as much for the eloquent and elegant musician, Jack Ross, as it is for the music itself.  While Rose does a wonderful job of helping Downton's upstairs and downstairs characters open their minds, her efforts seem somewhat contrived and immature.  Mary catches Rose kissing Jack (Downton's first African American character) in the basement as viewers brace themselves for what is shaking up to be a classic tale of forbidden love.  Given the various forums in which the provocative Rose has been pushing the envelope since she arrived at Downton, it seems possible that her passionate feelings for Jack are intensified by the taboos associated with their unfolding love story.

When Times are Tough, Commitment is Essential:
Anna and Mr. Bates are doing what they can to get through Anna's unspeakable tragedy.  Like many who are traumatized by rape, both she and Mr. Bates express a wish to forget about it and enjoy each other.  Unfortunately, no matter how much they may both want to develop amnesia and forget all about it, the pain is too great and the trauma too deep.  What is striking about their relationship during this episode is their willingness to talk openly about a topic that is tough to discuss in modern times and seemed unspeakable in the days of Downton:
Anna: "I know it can't be the same as it used to be.  I don't deceive myself about that.  But I want to make some new memories.  Some good memories.  So it's not as if all our happiness was before."

Mr. Bates: "I'm happy whenever I look at you."

Anna: "But you're not, are you?  Everything is shadowed.  Every moment we share is shadowed."
Mr. Bates: "You're right.  Let's have one evening when we don't think about it.  We [will] leave it all behind."